Thursday, January 25, 2007

Pic of the Week.


Feeling uninspired to write, so here is another pic. I took it hanging upside down from the landing skid of TC's chopper as we skimmed the big island. Just out of frame is Magnum kayaking in short OP shorts. (Cue best TV theme ever.) Good times. Actually, I really want to write, but nothing of consequence or quality will spring forth from the chunk of rock I call a brain. Maybe I need some opium or absinthe. Kidding, of course.

Wednesday, January 17, 2007

"Dave's a killer."

I just saw Paul Newman's appearance on Letterman. Newman, at age 80+, still looks spry enough to lace up the skates and lead the "toughest team in the Federal League". It's also fun to watch Letterman interview somebody that he actually likes and genuinely admires.

Tread Lightly Mr. McCain.

So John McCain wants to patch things up with James Dobson. This is what irks the hell out of me about politicians. McCain, for years, has butted heads with the Christian Right, but now seems to be crawling back to them in hopes of becoming the nominee in '08. If he can reconcile with Dobson like he did with Jerry Falwell then McCain may gain a chunk of votes. However, in the process he will certainly lose some of his "maverick" credibility and likely the votes of people like me who enjoy the fact that he calls some of these groups out on their intolerance. I'd much rather see McCain stick to his guns, win or lose.

Tuesday, January 16, 2007

Pic of the Week.


Feeding time at the National Zoo, which is one of the great (and free) destinations in our area. We went to take pics of Tai Shan and the cheetahs, but I think this might have been my favorite of the day.

Monday, January 15, 2007

And Reagan Was Talking About The Great Wall of China.

In a sad commentary on today's young adults, a Washington Post article points out that many college students responding to a civil literacy survey thought Martin Luther King Jr's "I have a dream" speech was advocating the abolition of slavery. Seriously? Students smart enough to get into college don't know that Dr King lived in the 1960's, not the 1860's? That slavery had long been abolished, but many social injustices still needed to be eradicated? Man, that was a tough break when Abraham Lincoln and Dr King were assassinated in the same year. I understand that most holidays celebrating important figures have become little more than a day off or an excuse to put sheets and towels on sale, but this is a biggie.

The article lays a large chunk of the blame for this confusion on schools squeezing social studies lessons in favor of reading and math. I too lament the pinching of social studies(as well as art and music) from the curriculum, however, school is hardly the only place students should be getting their knowledge. Parents are obligated to help their children learn, whether it is a history lesson or catching and observing fireflies. Not all of our children's shortcomings can be laid at the feet of educators.

No matter who is to blame , it is a sorry state when people don't know what Dr King stood for. Every American, let alone every college student, should posess that knowledge.

Wednesday, January 10, 2007

The Great # 8.


There is little new ground to break when writing a tribute to Cal Ripken, but in the wake of his election to the baseball Hall-of-Fame I thought a celebration of his accomplishments was warranted.

Of course, Cal's lasting legacy will be The Streak. Through injuries, slumps, bad teams and seemingly hundreds of different batting stances Cal and the streak endured. 2,632 consecutive games played. Amazing. Born out of a belief that a ballplayer should be hard-working and reliable, Cal showed up every day for fourteen years. Many argued, during some prolonged slumps, that Ripken was selfish and should take a day off. I never felt, however, that one day off would help ease a slump. And as Ripken often said, who would the O's plug into the line-up that would be any better? I agree with a radio host who said this week that a fortunate byproduct of the streak was that at every game every fan knew they would get to see Cal play. No one would be dissapointed to arrive at Camden Yards only to see Ripken scrathed from the lineup.

The streak, however incredible it was, should not define Cal Ripken, though. He is far more than a bunch of consecutive games strung together. He revolutioned the shortstop position by showing that a big man could succesfully roam the middle of the diamond. No longer would shortstop be the domain of tiny slick-gloved, no-hit infielders. That's not to say Riken didn't have a great glove. He may not have had tremendous range, but he covered more ground than one would imagine. He also expanded his "range" by using intelligent positioning, then gobbbling up virtually every ball that he could reach. (George Will's book Men at Work provides great insight into the brain work that Ripken put into each game, setting the infield and sometimes even calling pitches from shortstop.) He likely would have won more than two Gold Gloves had he not shared the position with the acrobatic vacuum cleaner Omar Vizquel.

As a slugger, Ripken's credentials are solid, if unspectacular. One of eight hitters to have 400+ homers and 3000+ hits. His other numbers add to the prestige-two MVP awards, Rookie of the Year, nineteen all-star games, and one World Series ring.

All of these accomplishments really pale in comparison to Cal Ripken's true impact though. He is a true hometown hero who became the face of a franchise and a city. Cal was MVP of the team that led the O's to their last world title. Once Eddie Murray was unfairly run out of town, Ripken became the anchor of the lineup. He was always willing to sign autographs, especially during the run-up to breaking Gehrig's record; this was, of course, the exact time anybody would have forgiven him for scaling back such activities. Instead, Cal would sign every last ball or hat even if it took hours after a game. Finally, his devotion to his hometown team was proven several times when he could have left Baltimore for bigger bucks elsewhere. Each time, he stayed to try to help bring another title to Baltimore. I will always appreciate his loyalty and I view that commitment to the Orioles as his enduring legacy.

Pic O' The Week.

Neat looking tree branch. Like a bunny or dragon. Or something.

Thursday, December 28, 2006

Yuck.

Tonight I found out that I have a higher quality TV set than I thought. I flipped past CNN Headline News long enough to see Glenn Beck interviewing Nancy Grace. I thought that potent a combo of annoying, self-righteous condascension would be enough to melt the studio, satellite, cable box and my TV. Bravo Sharp for building a TV that can withstand that unfortunate pairing.

Joe Photo


I have been having a lot of fun with my digital camera since purchasing it earlier this year. I finally decided to figure out how to upload the pics to my page. So, I'll probably throw post some now and again. They are by no means artistic, just stuff I find neat or fun.

Monday, December 25, 2006

Merry Christmas

A quick shout out to Baby Jesus , the real Reason for the Season. But there are other reasons to love the season. Among them:

Holding mistletoe over inapproriate body parts and hoping for the best.

Hearing words that , while perhaps not distinctly Christmas-y, are rarely used other times of the year- yule log, good tidings, jingle, manger, frankincense.

Watching the Chinese dudes sing "Deck the Halls" in A Christmas Story. Fa-ra-ra-ra-ra-ra-ra- ra-ra!

Counting your blessings, which this year include:

-My smart, talented wife Amanda

-A dedicated support network of family and friends (Some of whom even read this blog). I appreciate you all very much.

-A new job.

-Amanda and I have reconnected with old friends (Elisa, Jody and Matt and their families) and made new ones (Angela and her boys).

May you all have a warm and happy Christmas day.

Monday, December 18, 2006

Back Again.

I'm back from another out of town training gig, so here are a few notes from last week:

*Saw an ad for Daytona 500-Fragrance for Men. Because nothing is sexier than smelling like burnt tires and exhaust. I hope my stocking is stuffed with a few bottles (or maybe it comes in a gas can).

*While trying to kill some time by walking through the giant Towson Town Center mall, I passed a store called Leather Man. It took a large chunk of self control to not walk in and ask for Marv Gomez.

*Can we please put a toe tag on the latest incarnation of Family Feud? J. Peterman isn't awful (and he's way better than the wooden Richard Karn), but that show stinks overall. Bone-headed contestants, WWF-style fake posters planted in the audience and some bloody awful questions have made the show difficult to watch. Dispatch Awesome Dawson from the Game Show Hall Of Fame or put this thing on ice for good.

*While dozing in the hotel room, half-watching MSNBC I hear Keith Olbermann mention Wednesday's "Worst Person in the World" is from Salisbury, MD. With a cringe I sit up and listen how a middle school teacher made three students pee in a bottle in the back of class because they were not allowed to go the bathroom unattended and no one answered the teacher's call for an attendant. Wow. A soda bottle? Seriously? Drink it all in here. Now, I know that misbehaving kids caused the policy change and that teachers may have a tough call about who really has to go to the bathroom, but you CANNOT make kids piss in bottles in the back of the classroom. There is a time when common sense must outweigh policy. Hey, but any publicity is good publicity, right Salisbury?

*Finally, after two weeks on the road I realized how much I love being home. I couldn't travel routinely for a living. You spend a week immersed in someone else's environment. It's sort of surreal; everyone else is in their normal routine, but your life (besides work) is in a kind of suspended animation. I know some guys who enjoy it. Maybe they don't have wives to miss or don't miss their wives, but I wouldn't enjoy living out of a suitcase for extended periods of time. My sweet, beautiful wife makes home a fantastic place to be. Thank God she came along and rescued me from a life of solitude.

Monday, December 11, 2006

Quick Hits

I haven't posted lately because I have been out of town for a week training for My New Employer. I hope to post more regularly again shortly (when I'm settled into my new position). Until then here are some quick hits from the past few days:

I have never gotten into My Name Is Earl , but I watched this past Thursday's episode while in the hotel. Maybe it was five days on the road or the stuffy recycled hotel room air-I laughed my ass off. I think I am a convert. "To the Field of Rakes!"

Brief Movie Review #1:Before I left for my trip, My Wife and I caught Casino Royale. Bond is back, baby. Even though Connery sets the standard and I grew up with Roger Moore, I really liked Daniel Craig. He kicks butt, doing some action work that wouldn't have been believable with his predecessors. His Bond is both introspective and vulnerable, another departure from previous incarnations. Without giving away anything, know this- This movie has the best "hero climbs the side of the truck" scene since Raiders of the Lost Ark and some of the signature "Bond" elements are delivered in dynamite fashion.

Brief Movie Review #2: I thoroughly enjoyed Stranger Than Fiction. It is a little different than you might expect from the previews; it's more serious than I thought it would be. Wil Ferrell's understated performance grounded the movie letting Dustin Hoffman and Emma Thompson dive into funny, eccentric characters. Toss in the sweet performance of Maggie Gyllenhal and you've got a clever, character driven film.

Thursday, November 30, 2006

Heads Up, Scrubs Fans.

Meant to post this reminder yesterday. The Scrubs season premeire is tonight at 9. The Office and Scrubs back-to-back should give The O'Reilly Factor a run for its money as the funniest hour on TV.

It's Those Damn Tuna Flavored Wet Suits.

Sea World Trainer Held Underwater By Killer Whale

I was glad to read he is okay. These animals, trainers and shows are amazing.

Forecasters and Floozies.

This post is probably as predictable as the panicked preseason predictions were, but I don't care. Huuricane season ends today with a whisper. I want all the talking heads who breathlessly warned of an apocalyptic season in the spring to be on TV today telling us how wrong they were. Today, these experts look dumber than that trinity of tasteless party girls-Britney, Paris and Lindsay- that has been flaunting it for the tabloids for the last week. A quick aside to these girls: If you know the paparazzi is stalking you, trying to shoot an embarassing photo, maybe you should wear panties when you step out of a car wearing a dress. That way I don't have to navigate articles about, and photos of, your exposed, naked private parts everytime I log onto the internet. To steal from Dean Wormer-Pantiless, drunk and stupid is no way to go through life.

Anyway, these hurricane forecasters have to be the luckiest SOBs on the planet. Only baseball hitters can fail this much and get paid. As my friend Killer likes to say, he would be fired if he screwed up as much as weathermen. I know, Iknow they are only giving predictions. But these predictions are supposedly based on a wealth of data. After their dire, worse-than-Katrina forecasts, to see a season where not one single named storm sniffed the US mainland is ridiculous. Don't get me wrong. I'm glad they were wrong and coastlines were spared. I just wish they would keep the Hype Machine in the box until it is truly warranted. Yeah, right. It's more likely that Britney Spears will win Mother of the Year.

Wednesday, November 29, 2006

Hurtful? Yes. Lawsuit-Worthy? No Way.

I was angered, but not surprised, by Tucker Carlson's interview with Gloria Alred on his MSNBC show Monday afternoon. Alred is the attorney representing the two men insulted by actor Michael "Apparently I'm Only Funny As Kramer" Richards during his stand-up act 2+ weeks ago. Alred's clients are contemplating suing Richards for monetary damages. She suggested that the two men and Richards plead their case before a retired judge who would then make a recomendation to Alred on the viability of a lawsuit. What?

Look, I in no way endorse what Richards said or did. It was racist, indecent behavior that shouldn't happen. I'm sure the men were hurt, angered, disgusted, embarassed and humiliated. But somebody needs to explain to me, better than Miss Alred did, why these men deserve money. If they want to find Richards and punch him the mouth, I've got no beef with that. If they want to hang HIM upside down with a fork stuck up HIS ass, I'm fine with that, too. But, they do not deserve $$$. Miss Alred could not justify her stance in the face of Tucker's questioning. Perhaps, because there is no reasonable basis for a suit.

This case could be landmark, though. Maybe if somebody on the street calls me fat ass, I can track them down and sue them for damages. Oh wait, I have a better idea. Attention (soon to be former) friends and hockey buddies: I have decided that I was hurt everytime you insulted me by pointing out that I have a big nose. So be forewarned, if you ever called me Toucan, Noseboy, Pizza,Pizza (think about the Little Caesar's mascot) or Nose-tradamus, you will be hearing from my attorney. Paging Gloria Alred...

Mr. No-Glass

I haven't posted as much as I would have liked lately because of time constraints. My days have been filled with Thanksgiving visiting and training with my new company. That's right, folks, a new job! For those of you who don't know ( and for those I didn't tell personally, I apologize ) My Former Employer did for me what I hadn't done for myself by laying me off in late October. Once I recovered from the sting of being let go I actually enjoyed what turned into essentially a four week vacation. Now My New Employer, who I'll decline to name in this public forum, has rescued me from the worry and anxiety of an extended period of unemployment. Thus far, I like my new post with My New Employer and have high hopes for the future. Stay tuned.

Tuesday, November 21, 2006

Mint-y Fresh

WooHoo! The US Mint is releasing new $1 coins with redesigned Presidents' heads. Mint Director Edmund C. Hoy, during the unveiling of the first four coins in the series, said "Having lettering on the edge gives each coin a very modern, kind of hip and cool look." Really? First of all, when have coins ever been hip and cool? Beyond having a pocketful of them, raise your hand if you give a damn about coins. Following the fabulous success of using Susan B. Anthony and Sacajawea to adorn coins, I can't believe these guys really think dollar coins will catch on now. In an era when people increasingly swipe their plastic for even tiny purchases, how "modern" is a coin? Except for the lemmings who wanted to inspect my change for new state quarters every time I purchased a canned soda, I don't see the appeal. But if you do find it appealing, grab your commemorative pleather 43 slot dollar coin holder and get all the hip and cool details here.

The Curse Continues.


Sometimes when dealing with a PR nightmare, the best move is to simply keep your mouth shut. Somebody should have given Michael Richards that advice. I don't know if the man is racist or if he is truly sorry for his tasteless rant from the weekend. What I do know is that his disjointed apology on Letterman Monday night did him no favors. A coherent written statement probably would have been a better move than that awkward seven minutes beamed into The Ed Sullivan Theater via satellite.

I will give him credit for not using the celebs' excuse du jour of blaming the episode on being drunk and immediately checking into rehab. I just think if he wanted to aplogize he could have picked a better forum. Letterman was clearly uncomfortable and the audience really didn't know what to do, sometimes chuckling awkwardly. Weird.

Thursday, November 16, 2006

Now I Can Cross-Promote And Have Blog Synergy

I've created a new page that I will devote entirely to sports talk. I'll be discussing the hot issues, breaking down the games and rehashing fan memories. I believe the countless hours I have spent attending games, reading the sports page and digesting games on TV and radio have prepared me. Facewash is now up and running. Hopefully, I'll be able to entertain and inform. Sort of like a cyberspace sports bar, full of good-natured arguments and cheers. Tune in, if you please.