Amanda returned to work today following her 11 week maternity leave thereby commencing my new Mr. Mom era. I embark on this new era with sweaty palms and some trepidation. I have handled Grace alone plenty, feeding and changing her often. I'm confident she's in good hands, but it is still nice to have your teammate around. Amanda, I'm sure, has her own anxiety to deal with-leaving Grace, returning to work, knowing she's leaving Grace with her dopey father, etc.
So, how did Day One go, you ask? In a word-Chunky. You see, Grace decided that today was the day to have the two worst(at least that I can recall) spit-up episodes of her young life. I'm not sure if she is protesting Mommy leaving or what, but she uncorked two unholy floods that may very well have ruined two outfits and a TV remote control. I haven't seen this much spew since Lard Ass set off the chain reaction vomiting at the pie eating contest in Stand By Me. With her partially cleft palate, Grace usually has some stuff exit through her nose on the occasions when she does spit up. Today, however, it gushed out. It looked like when the snakes poured out of the holes in the wall of the Well of Souls in Raiders of the Lost Ark. I don't know where all the spit up came from; it didn't seem like she had eaten enough today to produce the volume that came back out. Maybe my kid is a camel that has stored formula for weeks waiting for this very moment.
But I can't complain because, other than coating my shirts enough that they looked like I was about to make french toast out of them, my girl Gracie was awesome to hang with on Day One. Who knows what will crop up on Day Two. All I know is I'll be ready for the spit-up machine having already fashioned a shirt out of super absorbent Brawny paper towels. Wish me luck.
How...descriptive. Glad you're up to the challenge of day 2! Hope all goes well!
ReplyDeleteI remember the days of "did he even consume that much????" fondly. Bam used to spit up so much that I too questioned if he had consumed as much as came up.
ReplyDeleteI'm glad Day 1 went well. How did Amanda's Day 1 go? Tell her we're thinking about her!
I can always count on you for good movie references when telling a story
ReplyDeleteA Brawny shirt...awesome....way to go Gracie!! Hee Hee Hee
ReplyDeleteLove Great Aunt Mary
This story reminds me of my first plane ride with Sarah when she was about 6 months old. As the plane was landing, she cried and then spewed this unbelievable amount of stuff all over me of course. Lesson learned: While it is of course important to have a change of clothes (I had 2) for the baby, don't forget a change of shirt (at least) for yourself when on plane rides! AK
ReplyDeleteI remember this day. I showed up shortly after episode 1.
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