Tuesday, December 01, 2015

Don't Get Run Over By A Reindeer

Can you feel it?  I can.  It started as a little wisp in the back of my mind.  Then it grew bigger and heavier; now it presses down on my shoulders.  Sweat accumulates on my brow as I work to keep it from crushing me.  'Tis the season and IT is the pressure to provide the perfect Christmas for my kid.  Make no mistake, it is a self-induced pressure, but a pressure nonetheless.  Maybe it's just me. After all, creating my own stress and anxiety comes as natural to me as walking and talking.  Maybe being in Retail Christmas Preparation  Mode for weeks has made me more sensitive to the subject.  However, as I watch other parents scurry from activity to activity, cramming their schedules with the joys of the season, I am convinced it's not just me.    As parents we are bombarded with "opportunities" to create memories that our children will forget by next week cherish forever.


You know the list: parades, pageants, plays, Secret Santa exchanges, tree lightings, breakfast with Mr. and Mrs. Claus, special pajama story times.  Want to ride the Polar Express?  We've got you  covered.  Want to meet Santa  and other costume characters?  Easy as fruitcake.  Stand in line for an hour waiting for a ten minute train ride through the same lights we looked at last year?  Sign me up!  I bet, if you so chose, you could find a holiday themed activity for your children every day between now and Christmas. Most will only cost you a small fortune.  And those are just activities outside the house.  Don't forget to squeeze in all our household traditions.  Decorate the tree, hang the lights,  build the gingerbread houses, make the wreaths, mix the reindeer food,  send the cards-eventually they all blur together. This year, I got the  nutty idea to go cut  down our own Christmas tree.  I have about as much business chopping down a tree as I do trying to land an airplane. And don't even get me started on my escapades with that damn Elf.


So, why we do it?  Obviously, calling it a shoulder-crushing pressure was a bit of hyperbole, but we do put undue stress on  ourselves to make the holiday season magical.  There are lots of reasons why we do it.  For one, we've been programmed that if we don't max out our kids' schedules there is no possible way they could figure out how to entertain themselves.  This is the same reason we race from dance class to scouts to basketball practice to underwater bowling to travel bingo tournaments each and every week.  We want the best for our kids; we want them to experience everything (except down time, apparently.)  Each of these activities has merit; trying to squeeze them all in is silly.  And taxing.  We are also told by commercials from every retailer from Folgers to Dick's Sporting Goods that Christmas is a special time.  Sure I get a little weepy when that grandfather-to-be opens those tiny Adidas sneakers, but it doesn't mean we have to find meaning in  every December moment.  Though, if we don't create and document a slew of magical moments how will we fill Facebook? How will you know what an awesome dad I am?  If I don't post photos of my daughter enjoying the lights or hand crafting an ornament what will I have left to post, Star Wars memes and shameless links to my curmudgeonly blog? 


I think the truth is we parents are simply trying to fulfill our parental commandment.  Not long after Keep Your Child Safe and Love Them More Than Anything In This World  is the directive Thou Shalt Not Ruin Christmas.  Despite my Bah Humbuggy tone thus far, I actually love Christmas.  Creating new traditions and carrying on beloved family traditions is important.  Too often, though, we force things. When everything is special, nothing is special.  Christmas magic should be organic, borne out of the simple, precious times we spend together.  A quiet night sipping homemade hot cocoa by the fire might just  be as memorable as sprinting from event to event (Except for story time at my store. You should definitely come hear the story then purchase every single item your kid asks for on your way out the door.)   I encourage us all to slow down and relax this Season.  I am going to start as soon as I get this tree chopped down and tied to the roof of my car.  Stay tuned for the lumberjack selfies.

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