Image Was Everything.

I am a few days late with this, but I wanted to salute Andre Agassi for his classy farewell at the US Open last week.

Agassi transformed himself from a young punk (He wouldn't play Wimbledon because he would have had to wear tennis whites.) to a hard-training adult in time to salvage his immense talent and become a legend and ambassador for American tennis. Agassi ditched the mullett and Canon Rebel persona and earned respect for his game and his philanthropy. He had fallen as low #141 in the world rankings some years ago, but used his trademark drive to regain the top spot briefly and win eight Grand Slam titles.

That same drive was on display last week at the US Open. Playing in his farewell tournament despite being hobbled by chronic back pain, the 36-year-old Agassi gave the grateful New York crowds something to cheer about. His second round match against 21-year-old Marcos Bagdhatis (sp?) was spectacular. The always exceptionally fit Agassi fought through his back pain and held on to win a five-set classic. Agassi forced the much younger Bagdhatis to run himself into cramps that hampered his play late in the match. It appeared that Agasssi was buoyed by four cortisone shots in five days and the vocal fans, but I know different. I believe his secret weapon was the Wolske-esque pink sports drink that he sipped at every changeover. Worked for Chris on the ice, why not on the hardcourt as well?

Agassi's farewell tour and sappy Hollywood run ran out of steam in the third round, however. Barely able to bend over for low shots, Andre's famous return game was short-circuited. Sometimes it is difficult to watch athletes stuggle when the end is near, but this time was different for me. I liked what Dick Enberg said during his play-by-play, "Greatness reveals itself under pressure and pain." Agassi counterpunched, playing enough defense to stay in the match. He was overwhelmed, yet almost pushed the match to a fifth set. As it was, he bowed out in four and had to settle for a warm eight-minute standing ovation. Now at 36, with millions of dollars, a hot wife, two young kids and a school he has funded from the ground up, he gets to live out the rest of his American dream. Congrats, Andre for choosing substance and greatness over style and flash.

Growler- Futuristic Fighting Machine or Overpriced Golf Cart On Steroids ?

I am not naive enough to think that the US military doesn't spend billions of dollars on research and development. I know this is necessary. I also know that R & D relies on a lot of trial and error. Therefore, I know it costs a ton just to design the equipment our troops will use, let alone produce it in mass quantities. I just wish the projects that are selected for mass production were a little better thought out than the Marines' new off-road vehicle The Growler.

The Growler is basically a reborn jeep designed to capably maneuver in many conditions. It is lighter than a Humvee and therefore can be hauled by the V-22 Osprey. The problem with the Growler, according to several articles I've read, is that it is not really built for soldier protection. It is an open truck with limited armor. From National Defense Magazine:

Jim Mills, an industry expert who helped manage the armored Humvee program, said it would be quite difficult to protect a small vehicle such as the Growler from landmine blasts. You can provide fragment protection but a mine blast would toss the vehicle in the air. You could install Kevlar in the underbody for fragment protection, panels behind the seats. Armoring the cab, he noted, would add too much weight and compromise its transportability.

It seems the Growler can be outfitted with some extra protection, but not too much because that would erase its benefits. Hmmm. Well thought out, gents. And, of course, while this vehicle would be a bargain at any price, our friends in the five-sided building are paying $127,00 apiece or, according to CBS News, $277 million for the fleet.

All this for a vehicle that will be hauled by the troubled Osprey fleet. The Osprey, the Marine tilt-rotor aircraft that flies faster than traditional helicopters, has been plagued by numerous crashes during testing. A Marine told me years ago that they call it "the widowmaker". So, to recap- overgrown, unprotective jeep with cheesy name hauled around by cool, if impractical, flyng jalopy. I'd sure love to see my tax $ spent on more productive military equipment.

Dear Ernesto...

Dear Ernesto,

How about being a pal, okay? Why not cut the Gulf region some slack? You can just make a little u-turn or dissapate completely if you like. I mean do you really need to power up and wreak havoc on land? The poor people of Florida and the Gulf Coast just aren't ready for another hit.

I saw Mayor Nagin and FEMA Director Paulison on Meet the Press this morning; despite their brave talk, they didn't look real confident. Even the engineers say it's "unclear" how the levees will react to a Category 3 hitting New Orleans. And don't forget Florida which is still recovering from four wallops in the '04 season.

Now, I know, you'll probably get a bunch of crap from those TV tools like Jim Cantore and Anderson Cooper, who make their bones off destruction and other peoples' misery, but they're not important. After all, look what happened to that bitch Katrina- she packed such a punch that they made her retire. So why don't you just scram and tell the next storm in line-Francis, Fernando, whoever- to take a breather too. We simply haven't had enough tome to erase our hurricane fatigue.

Proponents of Profiling Proudly Propose Preposterous Practices

Sorry about the title-I love alliteration.

I was reluctant to wade too deeply into the great terrorism debate, but it's time to hop off the sidelines. The profiling aspect, specifically, has me a little wound up. Things I've read in our blogosphere and elsewhere, in additon to things I've heard from TV "news" yappers have pushed me to action.

I'm fortunate, with my appearance traits, that I'm not usually a candidate for profiling by law enforcement. Unless, perhaps, the crime is -"Who ate the last donut?". Therefore, I've never had to suffer the indignity of being pulled over for DWB (Driving While Black) or been watched suspiciously for carrying a backpack onto a subway train.

It has been suggested that we must profile "Arab-looking" or "Muslim-looking" men. Let's break that idea down-

First, I'm not exactly sure what "Arab-looking" means. Not every Muslim looks like an extra from Lawrence of Arabia. And not every "Arab-looking" person is Muslim. I have one buddy who has dark skin and a full beard, but his ancestry makes him "whiter" than I am. I'm really not sure how you make the distinction between "Arab-looking" and "Not Arab-looking".

Secondly, once the distinction is made, how is the more thorough investigation carried out? It certainly can't be done discreetly in a crowded airport. Are we going to pull each suspect out of line? Will we have separate lines for Arab-looking suspects? I think specific targeting like this is tantamount to a return to segregation in some ways. Better not let any "Arab-looking" men sit at the lunch counter in the airport cafe, either.

Supporters of profiling peg political correctness as the reason we don't use it. While I do think we've gotten too PC as a nation, political correctness is not the issue here. Human decency is. I am dubious of those who say they would happily agree to be profiled or endure extra searching, scrutiny, etc. if they fit a particular suspicious profile. Who really wants to suffer the humiliation of being pulled aside because you look a certain way, even though you know you are completely innocent? I have a feeling when push comes to shove these folks would upset.

Finally, suppose we strip search every single "Arab-looking" guy to prove they are clean before boarding. Johnny Terrorist will just change gears and recruit redheaded teenage girls to carry out their plots. Terrorism is not an easy beat and I offer no better solution. But I know targeting a group of people based on the way they look is downright shameful.

Coming Soon: Samuel L. Jackson in LIQUIDS ON A PLANE

I have been considering posting about the recent foiled terror plot and ensuing media carnival, but I don't think I can say it much better than Mr. Wolske has on his site. With rapid-fire posts the last few days he is hotter than a Dell Notebook battery. He also has linked to some interesting commentaries, so check out his site.

On the terror issue, to put it simply, we all need to calm down. It is imperative that we sift through the muck that the fear-cultivating media pours out to find the real info. Stay informed, take serious what needs to be taken seriously and above all, step away from the panic button.

On a related note: Keith Olberman ran an interesting story on last night's Countdown. It tries to make the case that since 9/11 the feds have repeatedly used terror threats and ensuing warnings to obscure or distract from Administration problems or bad news. Olberman makes clear that it is all circumstantial evidence, but the video is compelling. In these days of spin and obfuscation (by politicians, governments, athletes etc.) nothing should surprise us. On the Countdown page, click on Nexus of Politics and Terror. Draw your own conclusions.

I wish my name was...

Every once in a while I'll hear a person's name that sounds funny or weird or cool or so weird that it's cool. I'll say to my wife or co-worker "Man, I wish my name was _____." Well, tonight I heard a new one that I like. If it didn't already belong to a Redskins player I'd wish my name was - Buck Ortega.

Eat this, Weed Eater.

I thought I was facing a common problem and judging by the volume of traffic on internet message boards, I am. My gas powered weed trimmer is a piece of crap that is driving me batty. Quite simply, I can't get the thing started. The weeds near the house are about to take over and I might have to resort to grazing like a cow to chop them down.

I always feel a little inadequate and less manly when I can't solve some sort of household trouble like this. I know little about engines and I'm neither mechanical, nor handy. (Which is kind of funny considering that I work in a construction trade.) I have spent the past couple of weeks fooling with this trimmer. Despite my best efforts, which obviously fall woefully short, the trimmer taunts me. Coughing enough to make me think it will start, it quits with a ratttle that sounds an awful lot like a teasing chuckle. Even the label on the engine- Homelite. Simply Reliable.- winks at me sarcastically.

Fortunately, I have a life preserver when it comes to household repairs, mechanical malfunctions, etc. I hauled the beast over to Dr. Dad's house so he could look it over. He cleaned the sparkplug and checked the air filter(Which, to my credit, I had done previously.) Still unable to start it, he decided that the gas-to-oil fuel mix ratio may be out of balance. Fair enough, I can handle it from there. All I have to do is look up the mix ratio for my trimmer on Homelite's website. Simple, right? Wrong.

My trimmer's model number is not among the two dozen that Homelite posts on their website. It's as if my trimmer is in a Witness Protection program for garden tools- "Don't look for me, I don't exist." Upon deeper analysis I realize that every model I click on uses the same mix ratio. Surely mine requires the same ratio, right? Of course not. Cough, cough. Sputter, sputter. Hahaha.

Usually if my Dad can't solve this kind of problem I figure I have no shot. I am happy to report, however, that my weeds are now trimmed and my sidewalks edged. I did what any self-respecting UnHandyman would do: I bought a new trimmer. This time I bought an electric trimmer so the choke, filter, sparkplug and fuel mix ratio can kiss my ass. The new trimmer is quieter, doesn't spew purple smoke and is lighter in weight. If I can keep from tripping over the cord or cutting it half with the string, I think we'll have a happy life together. I imagine someone who does small engine repair could have the old trimmer up and firing in no time, but I'd have as much tied up in parts and labor as I paid for the new trimmer. (I'll probably give it to Dad, who, with a few days tinkering will likely have it up and running.) So, to the friend that I teased for having a girly electric lawnmower, I say-Please forgive me, for I now join your ranks.

But you know the real bitch of it? The weeds are vanquished and my wife is pleased, but to me, the yard doesn't really look any better. Unless you have a well-tended, landscaped yard a few unruly weeds don't amount to a hill of beans.

Fly, Fat Ass, Fly.

Amanda and I took a trip to the Smithsonian's Air and Space Museum annex near Dulles Airport yesterday. Very cool place to visit. Billed as "America's Hangar", the cavernous building houses a myriad of authentic, restored flying machines that the Smithsonian can't fit in their downtown location. The highlights, for me at least, were seeing a retired SR-71 Blackbird (Which for it's last mission set a record by flying from LA to DC in 1hr, 4 min.), the Enola Gay (Which dropped the atomic bomb on Hiroshima. For an incredible account of the plane and its crew read Stephen Walker's Shockwave.) and the Space Shuttle Enterpise (Which never launched into space, but was used for many test landings and is the flagship of the shuttle fleet.)

Toss in an obsevation deck from which you can watch planes landing at Dulles, an Imax theater and an incredibly courteous staff and you've got a fun place to lose yourself for a day. I'd say it's a must-see for anybody who remotely likes aviation or ever thought about being a fighter pilot as a kid.

Maybe I Am Fast And Furious.

The other day, while hanging out at the Inner Harbor, I was approached by a janitor who stopped sweeping long enough to tap me on the shoulder and say, "You know who you look like? Triple XXX." Being the germophobe that I am, my first thought was 'Wonder where that rubber glove-clad hand has been prior to touching my arm?', but that's beside the point.

I stammered out some sort of response like "Thanks, but I'm not as bad ass as he is" or something like that. The janitor just pointed at me and walked on. I'm sure he meant the comment as a compliment, but besides the haircut, what do I have in common with Vin Diesel? He's in a tad better shape than I am and I really hope I don't give off the slow-witted, tough guy vibe. The problem is, he's not the first person to tell me I look likeVin Deisel. Not that long ago, a girl I worked with told me, out of the blue, that I have Vin Deisel lips. What does that even mean and why are you saying this to me? AAAAAAAAAHHHHH.

That's Good Writing, Dickie.

I recently saw two slogans that I like.
One was a bumper sticker: Critical thought...the other national deficit.

The other was a t-shirt. Though I didn't see the front, I assume it was advertising a bar, because the back read: The liver is evil and deserves to be punished.

From Russia, With Love Rocket

What do you get when you mix one smokin' hot female accordion player, a guy wearing a zebra striped suit, a singer who sounds exactly like the 'Berserker' singer in 'Clerks' and one "Bad Ass American Drummer"? Why, you get the Red Elvises, of course. Their Rockenrol show is something like Chuck Berry meets Chernobyl, complete with jammin' music, creative and funny lyrics and just enough cheesy stage antics to border on rock and roll parody. Their broken English (Amanda's uncle was trying to figure out if they are really from Russia or if it is just schtick) just adds to the entertainment.

Their entertaining playlist includes Love Rocket, Telephone Call From Istanbul, Strip Joint Is Closed, I Want To See You Belly Dance and the memorable Sad Cowboy Song which includes a four man drum "solo". I know this all sounds ridiculous and reading the website, which is a little dated, won't change that, but trust me: They kick ass.

We stumbled upon the Red Elvises thanks to Amanda's aunt and uncle inviting us to Bethlehem PA's Musikfest last year. We had such a great time last year that we went back this weekend. For Musikfest, Bethlehem ropes off a huge section of their downtown and sets up tons of musical venues, food vendors and artisans peddling their wares. There is music around every corner as you wander the streets. The performances are free and the food is fantastic. Within a span of a few blocks you can enjoy polkas, reggae, a dixieland jug band, some roasted corn on the cob, hand twisted pretzels, pit beef sandwiches and as many giant mugs of beer as it takes to wash it all down. Musikfest makes the Salisbury Festival look like a kid's birthday party. I highly recommend catching at least a portion of the week's activities. I fully expect us to continue our new summer tradition next year.

You Da Man!

While flipping channels the other day, I came across a news program hailing the dawn of a new era in manhood: Meet the Retrosexual. The retrosexual man is active, rugged, and not trying to be pretty. Oh, you mean he's a man. Warning: He may also be sloppy, smell, belch and laugh out loud when he farts. Apparently, the Retrosexual Male is replacing the Metrosexual. I suppose if you believe in this trendy marketing bullshit then it is now okay for a man to be a man. Gee, thanks. I guess I can call the salon and cancel that appointment I had for getting waxed "down there". (By the way, I was reading an article in which a guy magazine editor actually volunteered for a little below the belt waxing in the spirit of journalism. I guess this has become all the rage for dudes. I'm sorry, you won't catch me waxing anywhere, especially there. You can have your dead squirrel and your flying squirrel, but there is no need for the bald squirrel.)

You Play Hockey? On Ice?

Somewhere in the divide between roller hockey and ice hockey there is KwikRink. KwikRink is a synthetic ice surface that feels and acts a lot like ice. It is also the skating surface in the newly opened rink at the Crown Sports Center in Fruitland. I have yet to skate on it but, I have watched some of the skating and talked to some folks who have been on it. Apparently, it reacts a lot like ice. In regular hockey skates you can turn, cut, and even hockey-stop. Each stride takes a little more effort and you don't get as much glide, although I've been assured that when the surface breaks in it will get faster. Even with the "slower" surface the guys I watched were getting up and down the "ice" pretty quick. The puck didn't move great, but the ball was humming. The surface is similar to plexiglas and is covered with a light layer of oil. I know it sounds weird, but it looks pretty neat. Seriously. Anyway, the owner hopes to have ice installed in January and then fall into a regular schedule of ice in Fall/Winter, fake ice in Spring/Summer. The only big drawback is that the rink is much shorter and a little narrower than a regulation rink. It will hopefully still be a fun place to skate and practice, however. I'm hoping to skate on it this week. I'll post an update after that. A side note that some of you might get a kick out of : The name of the rink is Ice Magic.

Be Careful Condi......

Cracked up tonight when I heard a newscaster use the phrase- Condeleeza Rice "is on a diplomatic mission to Lebanon." Well, Madam Secretary, if this is a consular ship then WHERE IS THE AMBASSADOR? I really cracked up thinking about Dubya and VP Dick donning Stormtrooper uniforms to rescue Condi from the detention block.

You Are Not Fooling Anybody.

I crack up everytime I hear a PR guy or press secretary for a government agency or business try to soften the blow of bad news by spinning it like crazy or using hokey euphemisms. I know there are countless examples; I heard my new favorite today. It was reported today that the US government does not want to call the exodus of US citizens from Lebanon an "evacuation". Instead, they are calling it an "assisted departure". What kind of silly BS is that? We are not stupid. I think we can call helmeted 4-year-olds running for Army helicopters an "evacuation". An assisted departure is when the limo driver puts your luggage in the trunk for you. An assisted departure is when the doorman hails you a cab. Normal people looking scared shitless while riding in a helicopter or while boarding a cruise ship turned escape pod is not an assisted departure. Mr. G-Man genius who coined this term-Relax, it's okay to call it what it is. Some US citizens got caught in a bad situation and you're doing the best (?) you can to help them. Just be truthful, you are not fooling anyone, nor do you have to.

BREAKING NEWS: THE EARTH IS NOT FLAT!

Is anybody else fed up with cable news and their incredible hype machine mentality?. Lately I've tuned in on my lunch hour to see what's going on in the Middle East and to maybe catch some of the White House press briefing, which I really enjoy. (I know, I'm a nerd.) It seems now that every time I turn on FoxMSHardball360HeadlineWolfBlitzerHappyHour I'm greeted with the ubiquitous BREAKING NEWS graphic splashed across the screen. Let's get this straight: Israel and Hezbollah blowing exploding kisses at each other for the eighth straight day is not breaking news, it's just news. How about saving the BREAKING NEWS banner for when new, important, situation altering info is acquired. You are not "breaking news" if you tell your viewers something they already know or have been watching for hours.

BREAKING NEWS: Tucker Carlson is still a dope even without the bowtie. Duh.

BREAKING NEWS: Angelina Jolie is hot. Duh.

BREAKING NEWS: This post has run on quite long enough. Double Duh.

Hungry? How 'Bout a Knuckle Sandwich

I'm not sure how to feel about the Caps adding Donald Brashear. He is a true goon and tough guy who has played dirty at times in his career. He has, in the past, taken stupid penalties that have put his team in trouble. However, the last couple of years he has really developed his overall game, becoming a stronger offensive player. He will deliver plenty of big, clean hits that can be momentum changers.

All the great players throughout the history of the game have had a tough guy riding shotgun for them. Now Alex Ovechkin has a little protection. And to paraphrase Caps GM George McPhee - fights aren't a great part of the game, but if you are going to have one you might as well win it. Let's hope this move works.

I'm starting to get pumped about next season. The Caps have speed (Ovechkin, Zednick), grit(Clark, Brashear), youth and a strong work ethic. Maybe the puzzle pieces are starting to fit together somewhat.

Butch, Who Is Zed?.............Zed's Back, Baby, Zed's Back.

The Caps re-acquired Richard Zednik in a trade with The Canadiens. The Caps parted with only a third round draft pick. I know Zednik's production has been so-so, but it will be good to have another finisher besides Ovechkin. He's only thirty, packs some potential offensive punch, and, if he doesn't work out, is a free agent after the coming season. Plus he has had some kick- ass haircuts. Good move, McPhee. Now how about a center and real defenseman?

Simplified Spelling Society

After first seeing the story about the Simplified Spelling Society on this morning's news I was ready to rant on them big-time. In my quick-to-judge manner I assumed they were some new-fangled organization dedicated to aiding the lazy, contributing to the dumbing down of America. I have long said, somewhat overdramatically, that we, as a society, will be doomed by the shorthand and emoticons used in e-mail, text and instant messages. Capital letters, puncuation and using complete words seems only vaguely required. I remain convinced that in the near future teenagers won't be able to communicate in complete sentences. So when I heard about a group wanting to overhaul the English language so that all words were spelled phonetically I was dubious of their motives. I understand English is filled with silly rules and seemingly arbitrary exceptions to those rules. But I think that is part of the beauty of the language. God forbid we had to use our brains a little to learn it.

My anger was tempered a bit when I actually went to the group's website. The society was actually formed in 1908 (Don't ask me why Channel 47 was talking about it this morning; though I suppose relevance has rarely been Channel 47's strong suit. [Except for Rob O. No offense meant to you, my friend.]). The website mentions their aims of making spelling easier so that kids can use brain power to learn other stuff. They also explain why certain words are spelled certain ways (the printing press, the Norman Conquest of 1066, the Renaissance, blah, blah, blah.) The website is mildly interesting and I see where they are coming from, but to me their arguments just aren't compelling enough to make wholesale changes. I'd love to know what the rest of you think. Is this concept ridiculous or a worthy cause?

Serious Fireworks

I was happy to see the space shuttle Discovery safely reach orbit yesterday, but I don't quite understand one thing about NASA's plan. They announced that if Discovery sustained damage that would prevent safe re-entry that Atlantis was ready to be launced for a rescue pick-up mission. Surely I can't be the only one that realizes that Atlantis would be subject to incurring the same type of tile damage, can I? What happens, then? Who rescues the rescuers? I haven't watched the news today, so hopefully the crew's visual inspection of the tiles renders these questions moot. It just seems to me that NASA makes less and less sense all the time.

As a side note, it never gets old watching the shuttle blast into space. We watched it on Fox News which switched over to the NASA feed. Hearing NASA's official voice check off the telemetry was cool. At one point that thing was moving over 14,ooo MPH. That's difficult to comprehend. Not bad for something running on 70's technology. Imagine the possibilities when free trade and modern technology reach for the stars.

Oh, Captain, My Captain.

Captain Jeff Halpern left the Capitals Thursday, signing a four-year, $8 million contract with the Dallas Stars. While I'll miss Halpern, I don't blame the Caps for not paying him that kind of money. He is a solid player, but I don't think he is worth two million per, nor would I invest a four year deal in him. If I were Halpern, already living a dream being the captain of my hometown team, I would consider staying just so I could play with the dynamic Ovechkin. On the other hand, the Stars are closer to being Cup contenders and thsi is a major payday for someone who entered the league as an undrafted free agent.

As far as the Caps' future I'm not sure that Halpern will be as easily replaced as many might think. Halpern was excellent on faceoffs, strong in his own zone and brought fan appeal because he was a local. He also played hard every night, including playing through serious injury and family tragedy. I wish him good luck in Dallas.

I hope GM George McPhee has a plan because right now this team is terribly thin up the middle. I'd like to see some Free Agent money flow out of DC a bit.

Stevie Wonder

Congrats to Motown legend Steve Yzerman for retiring with the class and dignity that he displayed during his 22 seasons as a member of the Detroit Red Wings. Yzerman could have hung on for another season with Detroit, or perhaps another team, but chose to bow out now near the top of his game. Yes, he had been slowed by knee injuries and was pushed to the third line, but Yzerman was still a valuable contributor. It is refreshing (and a bit surprising) to see a player spend his entire lengthy career with the same team.

You can make the case that Yzerman is one the most underrated players in NHL history. He surely has enjoyed noteriety, but he is rarely mentioned when people discuss the greats of the game. A check of the stats shows that clearly he should be, though. 692 goals(I think that's 8th all-time), 1063 assists, 1 Selke trophy, 1 Conn Smythe trophy, an astounding 20 years as Red Wings captain, 10 all-star appearances, and most importantly 3 trips around the rink hoisting the Stanley Cup. An incredible offensive scorer early in his career, Yzerman improved his defensive game (to the detriment of his offensive numbers) and subsequently led the Wings to three championships. He is a by all accounts a team-first guy who never rocked the boat and has been great, giving citizen of Detroit during his stay. All young players in the NHL should look to Stevie Y as an example of the way you should behave on and off the ice.

Faster Than A Speeding Bullet, More Powerful Than A Locomotive, More Boring Than...

A and I saw "Superman Returns" last night and I'd have to say it was good, but not great. To call it boring is unfair, although parts of it did drag. (It's never a good sign when you look at your watch during the movie.) Between Batman, Spiderman, the depressing X-Men and now Superman I'm a little weary of superhero angst. I know they are trying to keep these stories fresh, but at times this film played more like an episode of Desperate Superheroes than a summer blockbuster.

There was, however, plenty to love about it. It was, of course, visually spectacular and the action sequences were by far the best parts. The best move the filmmakers made was to keep John Williams' original theme. I think the style of the opening credits was lifted from the original, too; if not, they were still suitably '70s. And, ladies, A says that the actor that plays Superman is "hot". Kate Bosworth/Lois Lane was looking pretty hot herself.

The other thing I found interesting is that there is plenty of subtext in the movie that hints at the whole Superman is Jesus Christ connection that has always been talked about. If you are looking for it there are plenty of allusions to it in the movie. Although, I suppose you can read a lot into just about anything. As Ben Kenobi tells Luke, the truth depends on your point of view.

Anyway, I'd say if you're interested in checking it out, I would definitely see the movie on the big screen. There are a couple of scenes worth the effort. This one was pretty good, but I still would love to see Kevin Smith's vision for the character.

Scope Me!

So I found out Wednesday that I need arthroscopic surgery to repair a torn meniscus in my left knee. On one hand, I'm relieved to solve the mystery of why me knee has been in intermittent pain (sometimes incredibly painful, sometimes just a little bothersome) for the last 6-8 months. After visiting a bunch of docs and being prescribed some apparently useless physical therapy I was finally permitted to get the MRI that revealed the tear. The medical system/insurance industry really ticked me off with this one, but that's beside the point.

The real point of this post is to solicit some information. I'm looking for first hand experience with meniscus tears. The doc says this is a minimally invasive procedure that has a very short downtime. I talked to a co-worker that had the almost identical injury and he said his recovery time (to resume most activities) was only about a week. He also said it was very cool to be able to watch, under light sedation, the camera trolling around in your knee. So I'm seeking others' experiences to see if their cases are similar.

(And Killer, I suppose this is justice about ten years later.)

Neato

I am by no means a car guy, but every once in a while something cool will cross my radar. My new favorite "vehicle that I'll never own" is Toyota's FJ Cruiser. Admittedly, I haven't checked out the performance specifics, but it looks damn cool in my opinion. Although, my wife tempered my enthusiasm a little when upon seeing it and its white roof she said it looked like a Mini-Cooper on steroids. Either way, its designed in the Land Cruiser tradition and was actually cheaper than I thought. (Base models start at around $22,000.)

Master of Disaster

Please, oh please, dear readers, tell me you saw ABC's Master of Champions Thursday night. I love TV and I love bad TV, but ABC may have succeeded in building one of the worst shows to ever reach the airwaves. The cheesy title is just the start. This show is what you might get if you had put Chuck Barris in charge of the Olympics. It makes David Blaine look like a Rhodes Scholar. I half expected to see Joe Romano, The Blond David Copperfield make an appearance.

The "competitors" were a 14-year-old girl who wields a bow and arrow with her feet while blindfolded, extreme unicyclists and breakdancing acrobats on spring stilts (One of whom was the 11-time World Power Tumbling Champion. Yeah, let that one sink in. Hilarious. Nice hard-working guy, I'm sure. But that's funny.) But by far the best/worst event was "The Master of Champions Cheese Grating Showdown". This event featured race cars with a cheese grater attached by suction cup. The drivers then "drift raced" around a block of cheese to see who could shave the most off. You can't even make this stuff up.

Some of the feats were actually athletic and interesting, but give me Stupid Human Tricks anyday. Besides it wasn't just the events that made this show so bad. The hosts, Chris "I can't stop shouting" Leary and former Playboy Playmate Lisa " I'm having trouble reading the teleprompter" Dergen added to the cheese. Throw in panelists Steve Garvey, camera mugging Johnny Mosely and former Olympic figure skater and master of broken English Oksana Baiul (who I swear was caught yawning by the camera) and you've got one hell of a party. Thursdays at 8pm. Tune in; you won't be sorry.

And don't forget Chris Leary's extremely creative show opening: "THEY'RE MASTERS. THEY'RE CHAMPIONS. WELCOME TO MASTER OF CHAMPIONS!"

Game 7

I know I'm a few days late on this, but I've been busy.

Game 7 of the Stanley Cup Finals was an amazing, fitting end to a fantastic Stanley Cup playoffs. During the game I was scribbling all sorts of notes so I could remember things enough to write a coherent post. Instead, I have decided to basically just list all the stuff that made Game 7, the entire playoffs, and hockey in general so damn cool.

Fernando Pisani: what a name and what a scoring touch.

Cam Ward: Edmonton native,22 years old, won the Conn Smythe Trophy and wasn't even the starting goalie when the playoffs began. His stretching pad save with a couple minutes to play saved the Canes season. He won more games (15) in the playoffs than he did in the regular season(14).

Dwayne Roloson carried Edmonton for three rounds. The Oilers were given no chance once he got injured in Game 1 of the finals. The rest of that team raised there level of play and made it a series. Gutsy.

The clean, freight train checks that both teams dished out. Lots of shots of guys hunched over barley able to reach the bench after being crushed.

Chris Pronger seemingly never leaving the ice.

Great traditions: playoff beards, the post- series handshake and skating the Cup around the rink.

Kevyn and Craig Adams,Carolina's grinders. Every championship team has unheralded, glue guys like those two.

The fans in both cities were spectacular. Edmonton's fans must be the loudest ever. I love how they sing aloud both the Star Spangled Banner and O, Canada. And Carolina's fans didn't sit down for the entire Game 7. very neat.

Of course, game 7 is always bittersweet because no matter how great it is, it is the last game of the season. Caps fans, be optomistic: Next season maybe they can jump up and make it three straight Cup winners from the Southeast (formerly worst in hockey) Division. (I can dream, right?

Is it October yet?

Mallrats

It's official: I'm old. On our way through the mall today to grab some greeting cards and some Chick-Fil-A we had to dodge these roaming packs of teenage mallrats. I haven't seen a collection of goofballs, hoodlums and half-wits like that since KNK Vending broke up. You had the redneck dudes wearing their uniforms of jean shorts, oversize t-shirts and bad beards.

Then you had the crew that looked like they were there for the Addams Family reunion; dyed hair, top hats, and even that T-shirt that reads "I'm the one your parents warned you about." How rebellious. There was even a guy that I hope was actually coming from a boxing match because he was wearing real Boxing trunks and boxing boots. All he was missing was gloves and a mouthpiece.

Last, but not least, let's not forget the teenage girls who dress like they are 35 not 15. Carrot Top has more material than the skirts some of these girls were wearing. I'll say it now even though I'll probably be made a liar in 15 or so years- If we have a daughter she will not leave the house dressed like that. Why on Earth does a 13-year-old need to wear high heels and a minikirt to the movies on a Saturday afternoon? If this all makes me a fuddy duddy at 31, then so be it. And while your at it, turn off that daggone rock n roll devil music will ya?

Cup Crazy

I don't care if hockey has become a niche sport. I don't care if I am one of 5 Americans watching the playoffs. Game 1 of the Stanley Cup Finals has been f-ing awesome! Huge hits, stellar set-ups, a big comeback, amazing saves, even a defenseman taking (and scoring on) a penalty shot; this game has had it all. And as I'm writing this there is still 15 min left in the game. At this rate I hope it heads for triple OT. Damn, it's great to have hockey back.

One Lame List

Bravo recently ran a special counting down the 100 funniest movies of all time. What a joke. You can check out the list on the link, but I'll run down a few lowlights for you:

*Police Academy, Meet The Parents and The Nutty Professor(Eddie Murphy Version) are all on the list.

*Slapshot(actually I'm surprised it got recognized at all), Ghostbusters and Blues Brothers all failed to make the Top 50.

*The Wedding Singer and Ace Ventura both made the Top Ten. Seriously.

*There are only two Mel Brooks movies on the list.

*Shrek was reasonably funny, but in no way shape or form is it the 3rd funniest movie of all time.

I'm pretty sure these people picked their top 100 in no particular order and then picked the rankings out of a hat. Either that, or they just don't know funny.

Awesome Dawson

Logged a little time, perhaps a little too much, with the Game Show Network this weekend. In doing so I caught some great Richard "Swinging Dick" Dawson action. In back-to-back episodes of Match Game 74 he was decked out in his pimp daddy uniform: turtleneck under sportcoat, medallion and cheesy moustache. Then I caught an episode of Family Feud where he was in full-on swinger mode. All ten players were women so he was laying on the jive pretty thick. When he had to send the losing team home he, of course, kissed all of them goodbye. Then the team leader wanted to give him another kiss "from the rest of the women in Kentucky". To which Richard replied-"tell them all I deliver until 3 am, darlin'. " Has a smoother man ever walked the Earth? I think not.

Redneck Rubberneckers

What is it that turns people into onlookers, bystanders, gawkers, rubberneckers? Amanda and I were outside tonight when we heard fire engines scream by one street over. The passing sirens proved too tempting so we hopped in the car and followed the billowing smoke plume that we spotted as soon as we turned the corner.

Was it simply curiosity or was it nosiness that pulled us into action? I certainly don't delight in someone else's misery(it was a business, by the way, and it sustained a bit of damage), yet without someone's misfortune there would have been no fire to excitedly chase. I'd love to think it's the journalistic instincts in me, but more likely it's just the fact that I wouldn't want "to miss out" or "not know what's going on". Of course, we were hardly alone in our pursuit. There were people flocking from everywhere. People taking pictures, mothers showing their children, and that one guy with the giant antenna on his truck who was probably sitting by his police scanner when he heard the call come over.

I do find it fascinating to watch the firemen do their job. I also always make it a point to drive or park away from the action to eliminate any possibilty of being in the way of any other arriving equipment. Some of my fellow gawkers are not so kind. I would hate to make a situation worse just because I had "to see what's going on".

We hardly ever do it, but when we do chase a fire engine, I always feel a little hinky about watching someone else's property burn.

Watch Out for Flying Pigs

He's not the first to make this suggestion, but Washington Post columnist Dan Froomkin has an interesting proposition for President Bush: Invite your critics, politicians or regular Joes, to debate you on the same stage. Break from the tired, scripted, made-for-tv debates and town hall meetings. I think it would be fantastic to see any politician, not just Bush, throw away the talking points and actually say something real, actually answer a question. Of course, I've seen enough real politics and watched enough West Wing to know this would never happen. Most debates and press conferences are as unscripted as WWF wrestling matches. In our sound-bite society politicians are afraid to say anything off the cuff that hasn't been scripted and examined carefully. I'm tired of politicians hand picking their softball questions. Let's see some real debate.

Where Have I Been?

So, I haven't posted in awhile. I thought about explaining that my job is a soul-sucking vampire that saps all my energy and creativity by the time I get home. I, however, have decided to tell what I've really been up to: I've been building an ark and filling it two by two with all the world's animals. Why? Because HURRICANE SEASON STARTS NEXT WEEK! RUN FOR YOUR LIVES! After all, according to many headlines and newscast teases, now is the time to get ready. Don't be unprepared when disaster strikes! I have a feeling the hype-mongering talking heads in tv news will produce more wind and hot air than all of this season's hurricanes combined.

The hype machine is in full effect despite the fact that the "experts" are predicting this season to be milder than last.
Just a sampling of what I've seen:
A bad sign for the 2006 hurricane season: LA NINA IS BACK!

Expert has 'bad news', '06 could repeat '05.

My favorite: How would Palm Beach County cope if both a pandemic and hurricane hit?

Look, I know being prepared is good. I know much of Katrina's disaster was related to people being unprepared and general hurricane apathy. But this is simply one more way the tv news can drive up viewer anxiety. It boils down to this when preparing for a hurricane-Use common sense. Watch the weatherman, keep some batteries and supplies and be ready to evacuate if it heads your way. Of course, I won't have to worry about evacuating. We'll just batten down the hatches and hang out with the animals until it all blows over.

Life's Simple Pleasures, #42

Hearing the melodious notes of the ice cream man's musical truck at the exact moment you are thinking 'I could really go for some ice cream'.

This Week's Reason To Weep For America

Apparently, asking O.J. Simpson to fade quietly from the national conciousness is asking too much. Orenthal has produced a "Candid Camera"-like prank show dvd called "Juiced". Apparently, he punks people Ashton Kutcher-style including, in one sketch, posing as a car salesman selling a white Bronco by promoting its "escapability". Hilarious, no? This guy is unbelievable. What's sadder, however, is that I'm sure this steaming pile of dung will actually sell some copies. Oh, wait. Maybe I'm being too quick to judge; he's probably just going undercover in search of the real killers. Sorry, Juice. Carry on. Click here to read about it and watch a brief clip.

Life's Little Pleasures, #21

Hopping over the boards and hearing the ice crunch under your blades as you dig in and push off, scrambling to join the play.



Is it October yet?

Not-So-Tasty-Cakes

Okay, back to frivolous and ridiculous topics for posts. This post is based on an actual conversation my friends and I had some time ago. It was late, after a hockey game, there was probably beer involved.....

We somehow landed on the topic of urinal cakes. That's right, the pink, deodarizing, cylindrical thingies placed in men's room urinals to make them smell better and provide a target. Someone mentioned that such a product should not be labeled a cake because cakes are edible and delicious. (I submit that a urinal cake is neither.) Cupcake? Fine. Crab cake? Yummy. Birthday cake? Awesome. Urinal cake? Disgusting.

After much discussion (seriously) the only other inedible cake we could come up with was the soapcake and then we decided the urinal cake should be known as a urinal puck. So, I need some info: What else are urinal cakes called? What would be a better name? And for the sake of trivial discussion, are we missing any inedible cakes?

P.S. If the brain power of this group of friends could be harnessed for good instead of silliness we could change the world.

Darfur

Every once in a while a serious issue that bears talking about crosses my radar. Amanda hipped me to some of the websites regarding the atrocities occurring in Darfur. I have little tolerance for most celebrity causes, but I guess I'll give Oprah and George Clooney a little credit for trying to bring attention to what's going on over there. Government associated militias have basically declared war on the citizens leaving thousands dead or homeless. Murder, rape and kidnapping have become the norm. One story told of how the children walk from village to village at night because if they stay in their own village they'll be kidnapped and pressed into fighting. Another recounted how women will leave the village to do chores because they decide that getting raped is the better alternative to their husbands being murdered. Nice trade, huh?

http://www.invisiblechildren.com/ and http://www.savedarfur.com are two sites that give further background and show what some people are trying to do about the problem. Unfortunately, the only real solutions put forth (besides trying to raise "awareness") have been to send postcards to the President and Congress. Sounds like a drop in the bucket, yet I don't know what else we as individuals could do.

AHA! (Warning:Sarcastic Conspiracy Theory That I Don't Really Believe Alert)

I've finally figured it out. The whole oil/gas price "crisis" is nothing more than an elaborate plot to get Americans to drive slower. On our way to Baltimore we passed numerous state-run electronic highway signs that read "Slower Speed Saves Gas". What's next, raising the price of barbecued ribs so we'll cut down fewer trees for napkins?

Proof Americans Are Stupid:

Robin Williams' new movie, RV, was the top-grossing movie this weekend. Seriously? Has anyone seen the commercials for this dog? I remember a time when Robin Williams was funny, but there is no way this isn't the worst movie of all-time.

Life's Little Pleasures, #37

Shouting "O" with 30,000 of your closest friends during the National Anthem at Camden Yards.

Although, I was a bit dissapointed that the Anthem was sung in English. I thought for sure the "Nuestro Himno" would have debuted by now. Kidding, of course.

My lightsaber is bigger than yours.

Thanks to Steve for sending me the link to this Star Wars fan film. It's kind of cool. I'm posting it for my fellow Star Wars geeks. (I wear the label proudly. ) However, if you don't have at least some interest in Star Wars you should probably pass. For instance, I think Amanda was very bored, very early. She didn't make it through the second minute of the five minute movie short. Anyway, enjoy.

Welcome back, Lord Stanley.

A few brief observations after watching playoff hockey for the first time in two years:

-Double Overtime is still supercool.
-Jaromir Jagr is still a wuss.
-The Flyers Suck.
-You don't have to be a "big-name" goalie to be amazing in the playoffs.
-The Flames may lead the Ducks one game to none, but they are in a dead heat in the contest for the NHL's ugliest uniforms.

Here's hoping for eight more weeks of games as good as those we've seen over the first two days.

Why Outer Space? Because We Must.

I've been thinking about America's stagnant manned-flight space program, wondering if it is wise to continue funding it when so many people lack so many things. My answer, of course is a resounding yes. The case can be made that the space program leads to advances in technology and medicine or that we must learn if there is someone else "out there". But none of things are the real reasons we must advance the space program.

Whether we are alone in our vast universe or whether we have fellow citizens in a galactic civilization is irrelevant. We must continue to venture forth because that is the only way to sate the curious human spirit. We seek, we explore, we investigate. Like sailing west from a European seaport or staking a claim to land west of the Mississippi, we must continue pushing outward, searching for new information. We must never tire in our quest for adventure; we must never allow our thirst for knowledge to be quenched.

The price will steep; we will pay not just monetarily, but also with spilled blood and the hardship of the occasional failure. This, however, is a burden worth bearing. Let us be thankful that there is no shortage of men and women eager to be pioneers. Eager to thunder upward, ripping across the heavens, summoning equal parts courage and insanity. Each time they rocket into space, the perfect pairing of man and machine, our astronauts carry with them the hopes, and in some ways, the fates of an entire race. May we always be willing to peer into the darkness and reach, with fingers outstretched, for whatever is next.

Good God, What's That Smell?

This post has been brewing for awhile, but what I saw Thursday put me over the edge. As part of my new position at work I measure and estimate jobs in peoples' homes. I have been in some of the largest, fanciest homes on the river and I have been in some of the low-income, subsidized housing. It' s the latter that I'm going to discuss.

Some of the apartments and rental houses I have entered have been the dirtiest, nastiest places I have ever been. I cannot imagine living in the filth that some of these people live in daily. Believe me, I don't mean messy or dusty. Everybody's house needs some picking up or dusting now and again. I mean full-on foul living conditions. Food and trash strewn about, animal droppings, dirt, bugs. You name it. One house had a pitcher of kool-aid spilled on the floor which looked like it had been left there for a week, all congealed and sticky. I guess it was just walked around as if it were a piece of furniture. The outside is no better; the yards are filled with garbage. Trash that does make it into bags is just piled outside the back door not in the garbage can. I literally look at the ground the whole time I walk through these yards to make sure I don't step in something disgusting or dangerous.

I don't understand how people live like this. Have some dignity and self-respect and clean up after yourselves. These houses are not the nicest places, but I know that before a new tenant moves in the apartments are clean, freshly painted and usually newly carpeted. There is no excuse for them to be trashed like they often are. Now, I know that, fortunately, I make a higher income than these folks and maybe I'd react differently if I had to walk a mile in their shoes. But I don't think I would feel differently because this isn't an economic issue, it is "how you choose to live" issue. Many of the apartments I enter are tidy and clean despite the tenants being in the same income range as the tenants with filthy apartments. One of my co-workers says that you can't help it if you're poor, but you can help it if you're clean. (While I disagree with him that you can't help it if you're poor, that's a whole separate issue that can be discussed later.) I know some of these people probably struggle to put food on the table, but I believe even if I couldn't afford a single bar of soap I would still pick up my trash and sweep the floors. I couldn't bear to lay my head down to rest in some of these places.

Now that I've rambled long enough, let me quickly get to what happened Thursday to push me over the edge. I saw the foulest of the foul. While escorting me to a vacant apartment, the maintenance man warned me that the tenant had abandoned the apartment and "really trashed it". I joked to myself about what trashed meant since I have seen some pretty nasty stuff. I thought 'What did they pee on the floor or something?' Oh, it was worse than that. The odor struck me as soon as I hit the door and when I rounded the corner I saw at least two walls smeared with shit. Literally. That's right, feces, crap, human waste, ol' number 2. How disgusting is that? I quickly turned on my heel and told the man I'd measure from the outside. I just don't get it. Can anybody explain this kind of behavior to me?

Dropping the Anchor

[Side note before I even get started-Could my titles be any cheesier?]

Since the announcement that Katie Couric will take over as CBS Evening News anchor I have read and heard comments about whether a woman should be/could successfully be a network news anchor. People question whether a woman has the neccesary "gravitas". Even Walter Cronkite sidestepped the question by saying that men make really good anchors(I'm paraphrasing). What a bunch of hogwash. There are countless women qualified to anchor the evening news. Truthfully, I don't care who delivers the news as long the news is timely and relevant. (Actually, I suppose the real truth is that I don't care who anchors the evening news because I don't watch the evening news. It's much easier to get news and info from the internet, 24 hour news channels or (gasp!) the newspaper. Long gone are the days of anchormen being the rocks we lean on in a time a national crisis. )

I think where Couric should be carefully examined (and, woo, wouldn't that be fun) is her credibility as an experienced journalist. I think those who do watch the evening news want an anchor that has the experience of being on the frontlines (literally and figuratively) of the stories they report. I don't know much about Couric's experience before she became co-pilot of the Today Show fluffmobile, but I think her candy-coated, Macy's parade hostess persona doesn't do it for some people. BUT THAT DOES NOT MEAN, LARRY KING, THAT A WOMAN CAN'T HOST THE NETWORK NEWS. Now, excuse me while I go watch reruns of last night' s Daily Show and The Colbert Report because their pseudo-news is funnier than the real stuff.

Big Monday

Today is a pretty sweet day for sports fans: It's baseball's opening day(the Orioles actually won and ESPN must have six games on), there's two hockey games on TV (including a physical, playoff intensity game between the Caps and Canes) and tonight March Madness wraps up with the national championship game. Although, if tonight's game is no better than Saturday's semi-final snoozefests I'll be in bed long before CBS cues "One Shining Moment".

Also, kudos to OLN for remembering that part of selling the NHL's future is celebrating it's past. Tonight, they showed a nice feature on Montreal legend Jean Beliveau. He is great player that I didn't know much about. Their piece will lead me to read more about him.

I'll Take One New Bladder To Go, Please

The ever-accelerating field of medical science continues to fascinate me. I just read this article about engineered organs that is really cool. Using a patient's own cells (taking organ rejection out of the equation) doctors are growing a new, properly functioning bladder. ( Perhaps Killer could put an order in for a larger one so our road trips didn't include such frequent stops.) I do find growing organs in petri dishes a little creepy, but I marvel at and applaud the advances we have made.

The Human Side Of Immigration

I've checked out of sick bay and returned to the bridge. To be less dorky, I'm finally beginning to break the grip of the cold/flu that has kicked my ass for over a week. I'm glad to have the energy to do something besides drag myself to and from work. So, on that note...

I never (well, hardly ever) claim to have all the answers and the immigration issue is no different. I see valid reasoning on both sides of the argument. My maternal grandparents emmigrated from Ecuador and ,sixty-some years later, are still proud that they became American citizens. In a way I find undocumented workers disrespectful to my grandparents and all others who did it "the right way" . As always, the answer lies somewhere in between the two extreme sides of the argument. I know that we can't leave things as they are, but I also know it doesn't do much good to round up all the "illegals", toss them out and build a heavily armed moat. However, I will leave the problem solving to deeper thinkers than I. I want to talk about what I feel has been missing from most of the punditry, commentary, expertise, etc on this debate: Compassion.

I believe Chris mentioned it briefly in his post and a Washington Post columnist wrote about it today, but other than that I haven't seen much mention of the fact that the people we are talking about are just that: people. Most of the millions of undocumented workers who risk everything to even reach the States are decent hard-working people. They are simply trying to carve out a better life for themselves. While it is true that they can be a burden to the system, we musn't forget that these folks are humans, not some statistics to be manipulated. They have hopes, dreams and fears like the rest of us. They also have a stronger work ethic and kinder manner than a lot of US citizens I know.

I have worked closely with both Mexican and Chinese immigrants in the past. Most of them left their families for years at a time so they could earn higher wages. I've often heard one side of a tearful phone conversation as these guys spoke briefly with their faraway families. (I never understood much of the Chinese conversations, but you could get the gist.) I know that most of the guys worked long hours, lived in crowded apartments and and sent the bulk of their paycheck home. I don't think I would have the balls to leave my family, travel across an ocean or a dangerous desert just to work some crappy job. I respect them for that. I also always enjoyed talking and joking with them and listening to some of their stories of home. I think it helps to dig a little deeper and get some more of the story. Like a homeless person or a drug addict, these workers are not two-dimensional stereotypes. Now I'm not saying I'm going to throw money at every panhandler(far from it), but it doesn't mean I can't volunteer at a shelter or help a homeless guy get a warm meal in the dead of winter. Likewise with the undocumented workers; we must look a little deeper and convey our respect and dignity for these people who are looking to improve their lot.

This Is How Much I Love My Wife...

I love my wife so much that I, despite my better judgment, the 40 degree temps and howling winds, I stood in line outside with her for 35 minutes today. What for, you ask? Was it for concert tickets? A movie opening, perhaps? No, we joined the legion of morons standing in line to buy ice cream at the Grand Opening of the Coldstone Creamery in Salisbury. Amanda heard the ice cream was great and I'm always game for a sundae, so we rode up there to investigate. I wanted to make a u-turn as soon as I saw the line extending into the parking lot, but Amanda (whose patience is exponentially greater than mine) convinced me to stay. I couldn't believe how long the line was. I doubt the grand opening of a library or a museum would have attracted so much attention. So yes, in the time it took us to make our way through the line to place our order we COULD HAVE DRIVEN TO THE COLDSTONE CREAMERY IN OCEAN CITY and gotten our ice cream there.

But, surely Bryan, it was worth the wait wasn't it? After all, Coldstone Creamery has the greatest ice cream in all the land.

Riiiiiiiight. The fine folks at Coldstone could have won me over had the product lived up to advance billing. Alas, it did not. We had two different people make our cones(or waffle bowls or whatever the heck they call them), so we compared notes when we got to the register. Even though we ordered the same size, Amanda had at least twice as much ice cream as I did. (And it wasn't like she was overloaded, mine was woefully inadequate. ) But, like Killer likes to point out, society has become more accepting of incompetence so I kept my mouth shut. (My gut won't exactly miss the extra scoop anyway.) Then came the cherry-on-top of our trip: The total bill, even with our promotional buy one, get one free coupon, was $7.07. Which means one of two things-either the cashier didn't apply the discount properly or I PAID $7 FOR AN ICE CREAM CONE!

Finally, I would like to say that I am very fortunate that my life is going so well that this is the kind of thing that I bitch about. I know many people have real problems. I may in fact be the world's youngest curmudgeon. I simply wanted to point out that today I was King of the Morons.

Rest in Peace? Not If They Have Anything To Say About It.

I had seen news stories about the Westboro Baptist Church protesting soldiers' funerals before, but a news story this morning made me take a closer look. This Kansas group, spewing hateful words in the name of Christianity, is despicable. Basically they say soldiers' deaths and even 9/11 are payback from God because America is decaying morally(specifically by embracing homosexuality).

A sample of the signs you might see at their protests outside soldiers' funerals:
"Thank God for Dead Soldiers"
"Thank God for IEDs"
"Pope in Hell"
"America is Doomed"

Classy, huh? Now, I've got a lot of problems with these cranks, but my main beef is that they are doing this at the soldiers' funerals. The families have the right to grieve peacefully and lay their loved ones to rest without having to hear and see this crap. No matter what your beliefs are regarding the war in Iraq, the US military and America in general, I think we can all agree that these soldiers earn our support in life and deserve our respect in death for giving their lives in service to our country. (As a side note, I have always been grateful to those who serve voluntarily, in wartime and peace, so that I don't have to.)

Secondly, I can't stand the way these Kansas assholes use religion as a reason to be hateful and intolerant. One blogger I read said it simply and quite correctly when they called them a religious group masquerading as a hate group. I know surveying my family and friends that I would find quite a range of opinions on religion and, likely, on homosexuality. I imagine my beliefs fall somewhere in the middle of that scale. (For the record, I consider myself more religious and faithful than my church attendance record would indicate and it doesn't bother me one bit if someone is gay.) Anyway, my rant is losing steam. I just want to say that I don't think the loving, caring God I believe in really wants to kill young soldiers just because America is morally corrupt or whatever these Westboro Baptists are saying. If you are even remotely interested in this please click the link and then play the video that accompanies the news story so that you can get a feel for these nutjobs.

Playing Tag

Okay, I'll bite. Chris tagged me with this list. I got a kick out of it so I feel compelled to continue.

4 JOBS I'VE HAD:
-Busboy
-Weitzel Boy
-Glass Salesman/Estimator
-Tugboat Captain

4 MOVIES I CAN WATCH OVER AND OVER:
-Cool Hand Luke
-Mallrats
-Fight Club
-The Blues Brothers

4 TV SHOWS I LOVE TO WATCH:
-Pardon The Interruption
-Scrubs
-The Office
-Grey's Anatomy

4 PLACES I'VE BEEN ON VACATION:
-The Cayman Islands
-Orlando
-New Orleans
-Hilton Head Island

4 FAVORITE DISHES:
-Sesame Chicken
-Chicken Fried Steak( Because regular steak just isn't bad enough for me.)
-Chicken Chesapeake
-Any Cheeseburger

4 WEBSITES I VISIT DAILY:
-Washington Post.Com
-ESPN.com
-Google
-Comics.com

4 PLACES I'D RATHER BE:
-The Beach
-Camden Yards
-Any House of Blues
-Sea World

4 BLOGGERS I'M TAGGING:

Since Chris and the bloggers he tagged are about the only bloggers I know, I invite anybody who reads this to post your list in the comments section.

Bad Sport Hat Trick

Here's three gems, just in time for National Sportsmanship Day:

-Tony Skinn, a George Mason hoops player, punched a Hofstra player right in the ballbag during Sunday's game. Nice.

-I love good hockey fight, but this probably crosses some sort of line. Evgeny Artyukhin of the Lightning ripped off the helmet of Ottawa's Antoine Vermette during a fight and proceeded to beat Vermette with his own helmet. If anyone has seen video of this please point me in the right direction; it has to funny as hell.

-A French man is on trial for spiking the OJ and water of his daughter's tennis opponents with a powerful anxiety drug to make them sluggish. He is accused in 27 cases including the tragic death of one opponent who passed out at the wheel of his car, crashed and died after being drugged.

I was trying to think of some commentary to follow-up with, but I think these speak for themselves.

A Few Notes From The Week That Was:

- Tough break(literally) for the Carolina Hurricanes. Erik Cole, their second leading scorer and a high energy guy, has suffered a fractured bone in his neck and will miss the rest of the regular season and maybe beyond. It will be interesting to see if Carolina can continue to hold the league's best record without one of their big guns.

- Saw a pretty funny Miller Lite commercial where men run around mistaking falling rain for beer. The really funny part, of course, is the fact that Miller Lite is making fun of watered down light beers. Hey, I love Miller Lite, but it's no dark beer.

-One would think that Dancing With the Stars would have broken me of the reality TV habit, but no. This week I've become addicted to "Deal or No Deal? ". You know, the game show that NBC will run into the ground like ABC did to "Millionaire"? That's right, I'm still a loser.

-Natalie Portman, hot even with the short hair, was pretty funny on SNL this week. Check out her rap video/interview. While you're there check out the "Chronicles" and "Young Chuck Norris" videos, too. All very funny. http://www.nbc.com/Video/

Maximus Bryanus

Which action hero would you be?
This is kind of a fun quiz. My action hero alter ego is Maximus from Gladiator. Thanks to Steve for tuning me into the Quiz. Steve has a cool site, www.digitalreign.org. He has some funny insights and lots of awesome photos.
Check it out.

Time to Party?

Today is Fat Tuesday. In my case, this is the day between Fat Monday and Fat Wednesday. But New Orleans' case, the day is by no means mundane. It, along with all of Mardi Gras, is a time to celebrate all things New Orleans: the rich culture, the city's heritage, the city's diverse population. Amanda and I were discussing whether the Mardi Gras celebrations were appropriate given the state of the area post-Katrina. I thought the excess of the celebration might be a little disrespectful to all those who still have nothing. We ultimately decided that we thought it should go on. It can help the area normalize, can have a positive economic impact and in some ways can be therapeutic to the citizens. I then read some things online that made me think we were right. Residents likened cancelling Mardi Gras to cancelling Christmas after a tragedy; you just wouldn't do it. They also likened the last six months to a New Orleans Jazz funeral; it starts out somber, but eventually turns into a soulful, music filled celebration of life. Hopefully New Orleans is back on its way to being healed. This was one of the blogs that I read that had some of the positive comments. It is kind of interesting to read residents thoughts on the subject.

Countdown

I have recently been trying to watch more of MSNBC's Countdown with Keith Olberman(weeknights 8pm). He first came across my radar when he and Dan Patrick anchored the Sportscenter's Big Show in the mid-90's. They were hilarious together and really took the chemistry and banter to a new level when doing the highlights. Although, they were the forefathers of today's bloated, bad catchphrase, hype machine Sportscenter, so maybe I should hate Keith Olberman instead.

Anyway, on Countdown Olberman covers current events, odd stories and weird events with his sharp wit and slightly demented point of view. He is sarcastic, irritable and often very funny. Sometimes he is a bit sanctimonious and his views run more liberal than mine, but he makes me laugh and even sometimes makes me think. Check it out.

Bork, Bork-Go Crazy Sweden, You Just Struck Gold!

I wish that everyone that has been a casual hockey fan or who has even shown an interest in hockey could have watched Sunday's Olympic gold medal game featuring Sweden versus Finland. The game was so action-packed that I believe it could have converted many fence-sitters into full blown fans. I maintain that, unlike some sports, hockey is best when viewed in person. But if you can't be there live, then I think a game like yesterday's was the next best thing. It had a little bit of everything: Strong goaltending, wide open end-to-end action, a few big hits, smooth passing and a frantic Finnish finish.

The two young goaltenders, Antero Niitymaki and Henrik Lundquist, were tremendous. I can't remember any amazing, standing-on-their-head saves, but they made many tough saves through traffic using textbook positioning and quick reflexes. This type of goaltending is often overlooked and underappreciated. I was happy to see that Niitymaki's silver medal performance earned him tournament MVP.

I was also impressed with the energy of the two teams despite the fact that each was playing their eighth game in twelve days. Finland's Niklas (Don't call me Larry) Hagman was a hummingbird buzzing all over the ice all game long. Peter Forsberg belted Ruutu early in the game setting the physical tone. I love watching Forsberg play. He can score, deftly pass, deliver big hits and I'm not sure that there is a better stickhandler in traffic anywhere in the world. As fun as it is to see a player deek somebody out of their shorts, I prefer to watch a player like Forsberg dangle, cradle, tap and shield the puck as he picks his way through multiple defenders.

Most of all, the game was plain fun to watch. You had great players, a Finland TEAM (a novel approach don't you think USA and Canada?) not expected to play that deep into the tourney, loud chanting fans, and excellent coverage and production by NBC. I loved that the bronze and gold medal games were played without commercial interruption. Fewer TV timeouts=better flow= better hockey. I could also get used to waking up to live Sunday morning hockey. Apparently nobody watches the NHL in primetime; why not weekend AM games. Finally, the game had an exciting conclusion that wasn't decided until Sweden cleared their zone with just a few seconds to play. Since I had no rooting interest overall, I was pulling hard for Finland to tie it up, just so I could see some OT or even a shootout. The game was so great I wasn't ready for it to be over. So pass the swedish meatballs, the swedish fish and anything else remotely Swedish that I can moronically squeeze into this post. It's time to celebrate the gold.

A few funny things I saw and heard this week.

These things made me laugh. But I'm a dope, so you may disagree:

1) While watching The Dukes of Hazzard (tv rerun, not movie) I happened to have the sound off, so the closed captions were running on the bottom of the screen. Roscoe P. Coltrain uttered his trademark chuckle(?) which was spelled "GHKUH-GHKUH" on the captioning. I had never considered how this might have been spelled in print, but I cracked up when I saw this. Absurd and hilarious. Yes, it doesn't take much to entertain me.

2) My wife saw a T-shirt that read: Libertarian- No longer voting for the lesser of two evils.

3) Line of the week: Pardon The Interruption co-host Tony Kornheiser, when asked about the absurdity of twelve psychics being brought in to help find a missing show dog:"Twelve psychics- good; big hunk of raw meat- better."

4) Watching Wayne Gretzky spit and stare at the floor, looking like he was going to vomit during the waning moments of Canada's loss to Russia on Wednesday.

One Tough Mama

http://espn.go.com/outdoors/general/news/2006/0221/2338668.html

My Fast isn't so Fast

My favorite new ad campaign is Volkswagen's Make Friends With Your Fast commercials. In them, guys are tempted by a little black speed demon that encourages them to drive fast even at the expense of other things like making their wives happy. My favorite shows a guy not letting his girlfriend roll up the window and then, when she continues to complain, telling her that he can't enjoy the drive with all the "yakety-yak". I saw another funny one tonight that showed a cop with a My Fast wearing aviator/cop sunglasses. Silly, but funny. Just like I like em.

I don't think they have the commercials on their website, but if you go here and click on "fast" you can see the speed demon(at least that's what I call him).

Doctors discover group of idiots that share same brain.

The Magic, Schwann's Man, The Boughner, The Boot, There I was.... On Ass, Dead Squirrel, Bob Melvin, Fred the Red, Cold.....Cold...Too Loud,Bean Soup Disaster....

Some people reading those phrases are laughing, some nodding knowingly, others are perplexed. To many, these are random phrases. To those in the know, these are but some of the words that are part of a shorthand that my friends and I have unintentionally developed over years of shared experiences and shared memories. Let me explain.

While reading some of our recent blog posts and comments I realized that my group of friends and I really do talk in some sort of code. A point can be made and understood with very few actual words communicated. For example, we don't have to say "Hey, remember that time Chris broke those two dishes by throwing them in my sink and shouted "Two Plates". No, instead, all one of us has to say is "Two plates!" and it is immediately known what he is referring to. This comes from retelling and reliving (usually accompanied by much weary eye-rolling from wives who have heard the stories way too many times) the same old great stories over and over. It also stems from the fact that collectively we are a bunch of goofballs. And it's not just storytelling; we might be able to point out or relate an observation with one of the short phrases that, while technically not related, can make something immediately understood. (I can't think of an example, but trust me, it happens.)

On more than one occasion my friend Vaughn and I have had a conversation that will leave us howling with laughter while leaving our wives asking each other if they have any idea what we are talking about. In the same vein, I am convinced that some of my friends and I could have a conversation consisting entirely of movie dialogue and somehow communicate some relevant information. I guess I'm lucky to have good buddies with whom I can enjoy good times and relive the glory days. They will understand that I must now ABORT, ABORT!

Hope Springs Eternal

O's pitchers and catchers reported to spring training on Thursday.

YEAH BABY, BASEBALL IS BACK!
I can already taste the cold beer and feel the warm sun shining down on the centerfield bleachers at Camden Yards.

I hate that guy.

Has anybody else encountered The Annoying Waiter? You know the overly helpful, super-friendly, quick with a joke guy that acts like he's your best buddy from the moment that he takes your drink order.

Let me interrupt this post to assure everyone that this is not a slam against all waiters and waitresses. I know it is a thankless, often low paying job. I was a busboy at two different restaurants so I know the hellish days that wait staffs have to endure. Most servers are fantastic. Our waitress last night was perfect. She was friendly and attentive without being smothering. It was her neighbor in the adjacent section who was driving me nuts.

I watched The Annoying Waiter :

-Casually roll up to a table in a chair to check on his customers.
-While clearing an empty plate from one table, turn to another and say, "See ladies that's how it's done. No leftovers."
-Greet a booth filled by two women by tossing coasters onto the table from three feet away, plopping down on one of the benches and saying loudly, "I guess you guys are my next customers".
-And of course he was the one aggressively leading the happy birthday announcement and song in a restaurant that I always enjoyed because it was quiet and low-key. (Olive Garden)

As my wife correctly pointed out in so many words, I'm a knucklehead for letting something like this annoy me, especially when he wasn't even our waiter. But that's me, trying hard to sweat the small stuff that I have no control over.

What to do, what to do?

I figure if Killer can blog about his brush with death (very scary when you hear the details) and Rob T can blog about his testicular troubles( about which I know no details) that I can get serious for a bit. This isn't a plea for advice, although it is always welcome, but rather just a little venting/thinking out loud on my part.

I am having a bit of a career dilemma. I was recently promoted through no direct effort on my part. I was told my skills were needed in another branch and that it was put to me in a way that I didn't really feel like I wanted to ask what happened if I said no. So, I've been shipped to the Salisbury store and have been handed an office, a company car, more power and a pretty sweet raise. The company I work for is thriving, the benefits are great, I like the people I work with and for and the big boss treats his employees really well.

The problem? I really can't stand the type of work I do. I didn't really enjoy my previous position either, but I at least I had carved it into a managable, tolerable task. This new position demands a lot more estimating, project managing and working with other companies. In other words, it includes more time on the job and more headaches and stress. I possess the skills (or I am learning the ones I don't have) that the job requires, but there is a certain innate mechanical aptitude that helps in this kind of work. Unfortunately, I don't possess this. My brother inherited the math/science gene from my dad, grandfather and uncles. They can all visualize and understand the way things work, are laid out, etc. much better than I can. On top of this, my anxiety and social phobia (admittedly self-diagnosed, but I know its way more than just being shy) can sometimes make dealing with vendors and clents uncomfortable.

Some people would probably tell me to suck it up; work isn't supposed to be fun or enjoyable. Others would say that I should just quit and find a new job. And that leads to problem #2. Despite being 31 years old I don't know what I want to be when I grow up. I am envious of friends(Killerand Brent, for example) who knew very early what they wanted to do and have accomplished just that. As far as I know, neither regrets their choice.

Since it is highly improbable that I will ever achieve any of my top three career choices (in no particular order: lottery winner, professional ice hockey player, best-selling author) I am left to ponder what I should do. I keep waiting for that light bulb to pop up over my head. I know once I have my inspiration I'll work hard to pursue it. But right now, I'm just not sure which direction to go. Everytime I get a little jazzed about an idea that stinging uppercut to the jaw called self-doubt knocks me back on my heels. Anyway, I'll stop babbling, I could go on like this for quite a long while. I guess I should just be thankful that I have a job. (And a great wife, supportive family and friends, my health, etc.) Things could be worse.

My Mailman Would Never Wager

In response to Robert's blog post regarding Postal Service betting I decided to ask my mailman what he thought:

"Well....You see Normie.....wagering of any kind by United States Postal employees is strictly prohibited by the Federal Mail Code Article 2, Section 5 and it would, uh, certainly be frowned upon".

So there you have it.

Broad Street Bookie

Let me start by acknowledging that all of the charges that Rick Tochett is facing are ALLEGED. Now-Damn it Rick, what the hell were you thinking? I really couldn't give a shit if Rick Tochett blows his entire fortune on gambling or if he runs the most lucrative gambling ring on Earth. I don't care if he's prosecuted or if he broke no laws as he claims. I also don't mind sports betting in general. What I care about is the fact that by having whatever involvement he( and the 6-12 other former and current NHL players about to be named) has had in the illegal operation, he has given hockey another black eye just when it is trying to pull itself off the mat. (Timeout. That was one helluva cliche-filled run-on sentence. My apologies. Now back to our regularly scheduled post.)

Unfortunately, in today's media climate perception is reality. Rumors are already running rampant that players bet on hockey, that players provided insider information to gamblers and that money might have been laundered through current players via TVs and other expensive merchandise. Even the Great One, through his wife, has been associated with this mess. Even if none of this is true the NHL will have trouble shaking off the stink associated with gambling. Gambling, especially on the game, but also by players who may be vulnerable to outside pressures if their losses mount, strikes right at the integrity of the game. The NHL has walked out of one PR nightmare ( the lockout) into another.

I thought Tochett was a scumbag when he played, but I guess he was just getting warmed up (ALLEGEDLY).

FINALLY

The iceman cometh and he bringeth an ice rink to Salisbury. (Assuming that the reports are true. I mean we've never been down this road before have we? We've never gotten excited over rumors of a new facility, been to meetings, seen blueprints and heard promises only to have our hopes dashed, have we? )

At the risk of counting the chickens before they hatch, I'd like to pass on the announcement that was made on last night's local newscast. The Crown sports facility, a remodeled factory in Fruitland that already houses lots of indoor soccer courts, has announced that they are building an ice rink in their building. Being the skeptic that I am, I called the place for details. I got precious few details, but they did confirm that they are building a full size rink designed with ice hockey in mind. It is slated to to be ready in a couple of months; more details will be available closer to the completion date. Killer coaches soccer there sometimes so he is going to play detective to hunt up some more news. Anyway, it is very cool news, but I will believe it when I see it. Why do I feel like Charlie Brown trying to kick that damn football?

The man.

This link is to Bill Simmons' column on ESPN.com. I read it after writing my previous post( I swear) so know that I didn't rip him off of some of our shared thoughts. I included the link because his column is how I sometimes try to write. He just does it a whole lot better than I do.
http://sports.espn.go.com/espn/page2/story?page=simmons/060206

Not exactly saving the best for last.

Some observations from Super Bowl XL-

-First things first, Congrats to the Steelers for winning one for the thumb. It certainly wasn't pretty or easy to watch, but they are a tough team that earned this victory. They finished quite a run by winning three straight on the road and the Super Bowl. I would like to point out, however, how that run may have been quite shorter had Carson Palmer not had his knee wrecked on the Bengals' first play from scrimmage in the Wild Card round. We never will know what would have happened and it's likely the Steelers would have beaten Cincinatti anyway, but, like New England's tuck rule good fortune, it's a small detail that likely will be forgotten.

- It's nice to see that the NFL's poor post-season officiating carried over to the Super Bowl. I'm not saying that Pittsburgh was handed the game or that the refs cheated. Far from it. But I do think that the refs blew at least four huge calls :
-Darryl Jackson's offensive pass interference included less contact than many other plays that go unpenalized. If they called every play that tight we'd never see the end of a game.
-The phantom holding call that negated Seattle's big pass to the 1-yard line. Questionable.
-I don't think Big Ben got into the end zone on his touchdown run. To me it looked like he got as close to breaking the plane as possible without actually crossing it. As a fan who had no rooting interest, it would have been fun to see what Cowher did on 4th and 1. I do agree with the refs that once it was called a TD on the field that there wasn't indisputable replay evidence to overturn it.
-How in the world could they call Matt Hasselbeck for blocking below the waist when he made the tackle after his interception? This was probably the bad call that had the least impact, but it was the worst of the bunch.
A final word about the poor officiating-the Steelers fought through plenty of bad officating to reach the Super Bowl. Seattle simply didn't play well enough to overcome some bad breaks. So no crying in your lattes, Hawks fans.


-I don't think there is too much to say about the Rolling Stones halftime performance besides that they stunk. I'm not sure if it was them or ABC's feed, but they were constantly off-key. Mick Jagger cavorted around the stage like a sick chicken having a seizure. Not entertaining at all. And I like the Stones. I hope the fans who paid hundreds or thousands of dollars for a ticket to their recent stadium tour got a better performance than last night.


-I thought the commercials were pretty lackluster.I always look forward to the new ones, but last night left me dissapointed. That being said, there were some sweet highlights. I loved the old school feel; you really can't go wrong with MacGyver, Benny Hill's chase music or a cool voiceover from Adam West. I also laughed at Budweiser's lamb streaker and the lady on the airplane who ended up in the guy's lap after turbulence. Burger King actually found a way to make their creepy King head look normal- dress ladies as condiments and have them sing and dance. It was so bad that the Fruit of the Loom guys thought the commecrial was ridiculous. That burger dress was just plain nasty looking. Finally, my wife could do nothing but shake her head when I giggled as ABC touted their new show starring Rob ESTES. Yes, I know, it's immature and stupid, but his name makes me laugh every time. Wow, I really should grow up.

The saddest thing of all? No more meaningful football until Sept. (At least pitchers and catchers report next week.)

The State of the Union is.....Boring

I know I am a few days late on this, but I'd like to share a few brief thoughts on The Prez's speech.

-It was good to see The Bush Smirk was in full effect. I don't know if it is smug, defiant or just plain unnerving.

-I thought the Democrats were awfully disrespectful with their sarcastic cheer for not passing Social Security reform. This seemed out of place even in these contentious times. I half expected that side of the chamber to break out with a mocking, Daryl Strawberry-like taunt. " Duuuubbyaa, Duuuubbya, Duuuubbya " Love him or hate him, he is still the President and deserves at least a little respect.

-Sometimes I like to watch these speeches for presentation not content; I take the political affiliation out of it and judge it on the speech itself. This one, to me was rehashed and just plain boring. Tom Shales (a TV critic, not a political analyst) had some of the same thoughts on the address.

One for the thumb?

It doesn't even seem like it's Super Bowl Week to me. Maybe it's because the championship games stunk. Maybe it's because the Steelers and Seahawks are a couple of boring teams. Maybe it's because ESPN and every other sports outlet are beating it to death and I've tuned out almost completely.

That being said, it is the Super Bowl so I wanted to point out a couple of things and make my pick. If you can't beat 'em, join 'em, right?

-The only bit of "excitement" this week has been the over-hyped war of words completely manufactured by Joey Porter. Why this non-news leads Sportscenter is beyond me. I bet half of you can't even tell me which team Porter plays for. This wind bag needs to stow the trash talk and play football.

-This stupid tidbit has been talked about in many other places, but I thought it was dumb enough to repeat. In the never-ending quest to find inane trivia somebody figured out that this is the first Super Bowl where both coaches have moustaches. Awesome.

-I'm going to scream if I hear "Detroit Rock City" played one more time in relation to the big game. It's a great song, but my god, every show plays it every time they cut to Detroit. Are their no other songs about Detroit? There has to be some ballad about burning cars or drive-by shootings out there somewhere. Do me a favor; find it and play it instead of the KISS song for the billionth time.(Yes Killer, I counted.)

Anyway, onto the pick. Two strong(but boring) teams should play a close one. Whether it's a big catch or a crushing block, I think the under-rated Hines Ward will make a huge play that puts the Steelers over the top. Bill Cowher and his porn 'stache bring the Steel City ring number five (Only tying America's Team, by the way).

Steelers 23-Seahawks 17

Hey, did you guys know Jerome Bettis is from Detroit?

A Must See

While I don't think he has posted anything beyond a greeting yet, I imagine Roberto's blog will be something everyone will want to monitor. He's hands-down one of the funniest, most creative people I have ever met. But you may want to cover the kiddies' eyes; you never know what you may find.
Don't You Call Me A Mindless Philosopher